Finaallls.

Tuesday; Finals 2 & 6.

- Gotta look up famous, historic Spanish people & memorize them and the vocab.

- No final for 6th(:

Wednesday; Finals 1 & 3.

- Gotta look up the belief crap & memorize each of 'em.

- No final for 3rd(:

Thursday; Finals 4 & 5.

- Read chapters 18 - 26.

- No final for 5th(:

Only 3 finals, but still so much craap to do.

I should've studied this weekend.

Yesterday I wasted the day sleeping, dinner&boba w/ sister&dad, & talking on the phone w/ baby. Ou! & Watching NCIS ♥

Todaay, I ended up watching Up. It was cuute, sad, & fuunny.

Weeeelll, getting off to study now.

Hell Week

I thought Ap testing week was supposed to be the worst week in the world. Ugh.

So this week.

Monday; Pig parts test for Bio, after we had the fetal pig dissection. It was alright. Smelled like a bitch though & it was disgusting when the pigs leaked exploded blood. Then I had to meet up w/ Richie & James after school at Maple Hill Park to finish filming the remaining parts of our video. Theen, I had to cram everything in & finish my powerpoint & my essay. I ended up getting a C for the poetry shit, just 'cuz I accidentally over spaced something. WACK.

Tuesday; The day I crammed all my commentaries in & finished 'em. But then I had to edit the video. I thought it'd be easy. But the video format was a little weird. So I couldn't get it to go to on Windows Movie Maker. Ugh. So I had to install all these things just to get it to play on my computer. But then I would only hear the audio & not the actual images. So I got it to work on One True Media. Stayed up 'till like 2 trying to upload the video, woke up at 450. One True Media only uploaded 1/2 of it & cut off the other 1/2. So I uploaded the 2nd half. Woke up at 640, still not done. It ended up not being done 'till about 750.

Wednesday; So I rushed to school after it FINALLY finished uploading, walked in 10 minutes late. Then the fucking video wouldn't show up 'cuz the school blocked the website. So she ended up giving us a 0, which is gonn' drop me down to a C.

On top of that, I had a math test. Thank God it was a partner test. I think me & Melani, my partner, did pretty okay.

Thursday; I have Link Crew Prep Meeting tomorrow. It should be pretty interesting. But then it's another extra hour with her. She's intimidating.

Friday; Practice final for Spanish. Real final's on the 27th. So much shit to study & it's so fucking confusing.

I'm so stressed. It's supposed to be summer break soon & teachers are loading all this shit on us. I'm practically on the verge of breaking down. Ugh, I hate junior year.

10 Days Later

A lot of things happened over the past 10 days . 

So the boyfriend & I broke up like I said in my last blog. & I felt like shit. Basically,  I kept breaking down at every little thing that reminded me of him. I realized that even though others may view what we have as not much, it means more to me than any other relationship ever has. Yeah, we have limitations. But he's a genuine type of guy who'll always be there, regardless of whether we're together or not. I'm not just saying that 'cuz I'm 'blinded by love'. I can swear on my life that Mike's not a guy set out to hurt girls, if that even makes sense. Blah anyways. We talked on the phone for around 2&1/2 hours that Sunday. I was hella sad talking to him & knowing he wasn't my boyfriend anymore. But later on that night I couldn't take it anymore & he couldn't take it anymore. So we got back together :)<3 Lalala. So I'm haaappy.

Mm. AP testing was a bitch! Gahd. I was freezing in the gym. But thank God every problem I thought was hard, everyone else thought it was hard too. Phew. & Luckily, I only took the Calc 2 one. Idc if people call me lazy for not taking the Bio one; I didn't know shit anyways.

Dance concert's tomorrow & Friday(: Me & Lee had dress rehearsel the past two days. We're doing a freaky dance to a freaking song, Ramalama. It's.. intesresting. I like the ending, the tutting(: But the girls' costumes look like the Vegas waitress uniforms. Hah.

Excited for tomorrow & Friday night. :] But ugh, test on Friday. Imma faaaaail ):

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Oh yeah! There's something else I want to point out.

Karma's a bitch.

Gahd. I don't want to say anything 'cuz it might start drama. So keep in mind, this is my blog where I let my feelings / thoughts out & noone can say shit 'cuz it's not like I'm naming names.

Buuuuut. She's so hypocritical. Everything she says / said is EXACTLY what I basically said when I was in her position. So it's like, how does it feel to be on the receiving end ? I used to be the one worrying about the ex tryna take the person back. But now it's the taker getting their person taken away from them. If that makes sense. So. You have the same problems 'cuz of her just like I used to have that were caused by you. You're feeling the same way 'cuz of the other girl just like I used to feel 'cuz of you. 

All I gotta say is. Sucks for the particular 'person'. Gotta go through the same shit twice.

FL.

'The one that got away.'

I always thought, what kind of idiot lets the best person for 'em get away?

Karma. I turned into the idiot who let him get away.

Fuck relationships. I'm tired of the concept, I'm tired of the trouble.

Don't ask what happened.

It's unfair.

I hate barriers.

I hate lacking things.

I hate never having fucking happy endings.

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I still love him; he still loves me.
We don't have major issues or major fights.
We're both always gonn' love each other.
We've known each other forever.
& We're compatible for each other.
We both know that we won't find anyone better.
I decided to be single forever & live w/ dogs.
He decided to be single & live w/ cats.
Hah, sounds simple right?
But why're things so complicated?

Today I wanted to wake up & just be indifferent to it.
I want to just say 'Fuck it' & move on.
I want to be able to see him as just a friend.
No, a true best friend.
So I kept my head held high today.
Did stuff I normally wouldn't do.
I kept my mind off the subject.
But every little thing that reminded me of him broke me down.
This is supposed to be 'right'.
Then why's it so hard?